Life is Hard – Rule Number 2, from Mr B and his esteemed Buddhist colleague.
When I read this I saw it as nothing new. What I did see and feel (maybe because I was ready to hear and experience it) was a bizarre sense of relief. This may seem almost unfathomable to some, so let me explain.
Have you (or someone you love dearly) ever been sick and didn’t know what was wrong? You go to the doctor and they diagnose the illness/sickness, prescribe some medicine, maybe the need for an operation or further treatment. Although the diagnosis is not always ideal (hopefully not very often), at least the certainty of knowing what can be done has come as a relief.
So, my relief from the prognosis that “life is Hard” comforted me in knowing that this is the same for all of us (at some level). It also opened my eyes to the myth I had been sold from a young age that, if we strive hard, if we do all the right things, if we are “good people” then we will always be rewarded. Ha Ha!! I don’t know about you, but this is not the law of the jungle I live in. Hardship and tragedy can beset even the saints of our world. There is no formula, only that life is hard.
Please know as a coach, this is not cynical view but more a genuine observation of the thousands of personal and client experiences I have been involved with. It is a choice.
The BIG question is,
How do you choose to respond to the irrefutable evidence that life is hard?
As blunt as it may seem, here is my slap in the face position:
Stop living life like it owes you a favour, like you are the only poor soul who is suffering.
This may seem harsh, but please know my comment comes from love for you, the reader, as well as the wider community that is every brother and sister who shares the same “Spaceship Earth” as you do.
My thoughts are, that when we come to terms – and I mean really come to terms – with the fact that life is hard, maybe we will appreciate that:
- We are not owed anything by anyone – there is no such thing as entitlement
- Our happiness is not gained through the trappings and excesses of life,
- These trappings and excesses are toxic to us and are slowly killing the planet. (One more flat screen TV or Smart Phone will not be the thing that alleviates your suffering or make you happy or define you as more valuable than the next soul. But it might add to the planets suffering.)
I know now, that having been diagnosed and treated, that I can feel a sense of relief that I am OK – I am not more than or not less than anyone else. And maybe knowing this I can open my eyes wider to the suffering of others, with empathy, equality and truth.
Lastly, I hope, in this new found full understanding of “Life is Hard”, I can let go of the baggage that is meant to define me, make me happy or frankly, entitle me to more than the oxygen I breathe (everything else is to be received with humble gratitude and deep appreciation).
What about you? Are you ready to free yourself from the bindings of your suffering and pain and realise we are all in this together?
This is the final blog my series ‘Our Authentic Selves’ . I do truly hope you have enjoyed them, have been able to take away something and apply it to your own circumstance to enable you to live authentically.
If you would like to reach out I would love to hear your thoughts, feedback and of course if you would like to find out more about my individual coaching programs then please book in for your free session below.
I look forward to creating more for you soon,
Until then,
Pete
